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"Stop making the game prettier"... Hear, hear!

new maps Valhalla bored boring profit

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Risky_Dingo #1 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 17:42

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I think WG read my idea for Tank Valhalla, and the bastards said to themselves, "Let's piss off Mr. Dingo and do the exact opposite!"

 

And gave us SOCCER.

:sceptic:

 

My Tank Valhalla,

and I'm willing to pay just to play in it:

 

GIVE US AN ISLAND, you DOPES.

Size of Iceland or Catalina maybe.

STOP  FENCING  US  IN

(Just make the graphics good enough...)

(People still play chess on wooden planks, right?...)

(They play complex strategy games on cardboard, with little plastic tokens, and just as fun? Sure!...)

 

A dozen players off-load as a team onto beach or pier.

Other teams, the same all around the island.

Players are "encouraged" to stick with their team, but not absolutely required.

 

NO "OBJECTIVES" -- JUST CHASE DOWN AND DESTROY OTHER TEAMS

 

The coastline is a continuous ring, sometimes dunes, sometimes jungle.

Sometimes cities with harbors and more bridges.

Sometimes Norwegian fjords or rocky Oregon coast.

Lots of abandoned fortresses.

Sometimes miles of farmland dotted with outcrops and villages.

Maybe a swamp with treacherous half-submerged causeways.

 

Sometimes routes into the island's interior,

center of sweet creamy nougat: Mountains and valleys and cliffs and gorges and snakey roads.

Traversable bridges and dams and waterfalls and castles.

And tunnels.

GIVE US TUNNELS.

And giant CAVERNS.

 

Give us blizzards and downpours and fog and wildfires, and dead of night.

An active volcano maybe.

 

STOP LISTENING TO THE SNOWFLAKES STILL IN THEIR DIAPERS.

 

Just fantasizing. But I want a WORLD of tanks.

 

Not a village of tanks.

 

And I'm willing to pay just to play in it.



Tyrantzz #2 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:00

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:popcorn:

Creeper_Peaper_Reeper #3 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:27

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[edited]about ❄ and yet.....

Cognitive_Dissonance #4 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:35

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Holy Kittens and Flaming Poop, lay off the psychotropic drugs.

TeamTerrible #5 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:40

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I wouldn't give WG the shirt I just blew my nose on

 

If you worried about tossing your money away then just set fire to it...they don't care what you think



Kamahl1234 #6 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:45

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Man, you must love driving for really long times only to suddenly find yourself outnumbered and dead, or something.

 

Cause you'd need teams of hundreds if not thousands with maps the size you want, and that's ignoring the variance in mobility that exists in this game. 



Mazati #7 Posted Jun 15 2018 - 18:53

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View PostRisky_Dingo, on Jun 15 2018 - 16:42, said:

I think WG read my idea for Tank Valhalla, and the bastards said to themselves, "Let's piss off Mr. Dingo and do the exact opposite!"

 

And gave us SOCCER.

:sceptic:

 

My Tank Valhalla,

and I'm willing to pay just to play in it:

 

GIVE US AN ISLAND, you DOPES.

Size of Iceland or Catalina maybe.

STOP  FENCING  US  IN

(Just make the graphics good enough...)

(People still play chess on wooden planks, right?...)

(They play complex strategy games on cardboard, with little plastic tokens, and just as fun? Sure!...)

 

A dozen players off-load as a team onto beach or pier.

Other teams, the same all around the island.

Players are "encouraged" to stick with their team, but not absolutely required.

 

NO "OBJECTIVES" -- JUST CHASE DOWN AND DESTROY OTHER TEAMS

 

The coastline is a continuous ring, sometimes dunes, sometimes jungle.

Sometimes cities with harbors and more bridges.

Sometimes Norwegian fjords or rocky Oregon coast.

Lots of abandoned fortresses.

Sometimes miles of farmland dotted with outcrops and villages.

Maybe a swamp with treacherous half-submerged causeways.

 

Sometimes routes into the island's interior,

center of sweet creamy nougat: Mountains and valleys and cliffs and gorges and snakey roads.

Traversable bridges and dams and waterfalls and castles.

And tunnels.

GIVE US TUNNELS.

And giant CAVERNS.

 

Give us blizzards and downpours and fog and wildfires, and dead of night.

An active volcano maybe.

 

STOP LISTENING TO THE SNOWFLAKES STILL IN THEIR DIAPERS.

 

Just fantasizing. But I want a WORLD of tanks.

 

Not a village of tanks.

 

And I'm willing to pay just to play in it.

 

Ya not happening but battlegroundeurope has some of that 8)

Risky_Dingo #8 Posted Jun 17 2018 - 14:27

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:B  I stand praised by faint damnation.

 

Good point about such a map's immensity requiring an immensity of effort.

But would it really be that difficult, that time-consuming, that expensive?

Preliminary sketches >> base terrain form >> designer sector assignment >> applying stock graphic texture overlays >> install structure modules  >> pre-beta-test... 

I don't think it'd be like painting the Sistine Chapel.

 

Then again, I don't know much about it, actually. But I have modified maps for Vietcong 2 multiplayer (GameSpy), with third-party software. (I was "oneHotterOtter." in the multiplayer.)

The app was very user-unfriendly and oddly counter-intuitive to the novice, but results could be quick for a skilled user.

 

Maybe put some A.I. to assist the task?

Hehheh... I bet they're applying for a Tank Valhalla trademark as we speak...



Risky_Dingo #9 Posted Jun 19 2018 - 17:44

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View PostCreeper_Peaper_Reeper, on Jun 15 2018 - 18:27, said:

[edited]about ❄ and yet.....

 

and yet WHAT

grrr...



64sherman #10 Posted Jun 19 2018 - 20:26

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I liked the soccer... 





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